#PublishingReinvented 240 - Unhinged Blurbs - Going Wild As Indies

You may want to test these on social media first. Clearly they are not for everyone, but hopefully they might spark something in you.

Sometimes we need to go wild and change things up. Would any of these suit your book:

Crime & Thriller:

🔪 “This book is more addictive than your ex’s drama—except with actual murder.”
🔥 “Buckle up. This ride is illegal in most countries.”
🚔 “If you read this in public, people might call the cops.”
👀 “The FBI might put YOU on a watchlist for reading this.”

Horror:

👻 “If you value sleep, don’t read this.”
💀 “You’ll need therapy after this one. No refunds.”
🩸 “The author is definitely on some kind of government list.”
⚰️ “Read this if you dare, but don’t blame us when your lights flicker.”
🧠 “A book so twisted it should come with a free exorcism.”

Sci-Fi & Fantasy:

🚀 “Warning: May cause existential crises and/or spontaneous spaceship purchases.”
🐉 “Dragons? Yes. Magic? Yes. Sanity? Questionable.”
🌌 “For legal reasons, we must inform you this book is NOT a portal to another dimension. (Or is it?)”
⚔️ “This book contains: swords, spells, and at least one unhinged villain you’ll probably simp for.”
🛸 “Aliens are real. Time travel exists. This book is proof.”

Romance:

💋 “So spicy, your Kindle might overheat.”
🔥 “Warning: This book may cause unrealistic expectations of love, abs, and brooding billionaires.”
💍 “This book stole my heart. And my sleep. And my ability to function.”
🥵 “Guaranteed to ruin real men for you forever.”

Literary & Historical Fiction:

📜 “Like a history lesson, but with more drama and fewer pop quizzes.”
🎭 “The kind of book that makes you question everything.”
🔥 “Tragic. Beautiful. Devastating. You will cry, and you will thank me.”
🖋 “A masterpiece, but also a crime against your emotions.”

Mystery & Suspense:

🔎 “Every chapter is a plot twist. Good luck.”
📖 “Your trust issues will get worse.”
⏳ “You won’t sleep until you finish it. Then you won’t sleep because of it.”

General Unhinged:

📚 “The book you didn’t know you needed but now can’t live without.”
😵 “Do NOT read this if you have things to do tomorrow.”
🛑 “Not for the weak. (Or the emotionally stable.)”

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